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2015; don’t let the door hit you on the ass on the way out …

December 31, 2015

2015 is coming to a rapid end, and I couldn’t be much happier, even though tomorrow is truly “just another Friday.” Try as I might to not give New Year’s Day any additional significance than being the first day on the calendar, it seems impossible to ignore the added weight it is given. I mean, it really is just another day- nothing magical happens, we are not somehow reborn or transformed, we’re not given a piece of paper that says “you get to start all over” … it is, very simply, just another day.

But …

As a species, we humans have chosen to mark the beginning of each year- whether built on a Roman calendar, Mayan calendar, or lunar calendar- as something special. Why? Because we like to believe that “things will be different this year”, rather than just admitting that today will be the same thing as yesterday, and tomorrow will be the same thing as today, just with a sunset and sunrise in between … if we’re lucky enough to live to see it.

I know that tomorrow will be the same as today, I’ll be the same person, my life will be the same- unless I *do* something different to make a change. And the one thing that has become clearer and clearer in my life as I’ve gotten older is “the only constant in life is change.” In a lot of ways, the past few years have quite frankly sucked. Bad. Obviously, there have been high points to accompany the lows. That’s how life works. Up is replaced by down. Left is replaced by right. Hot is replaced by cold. Etc, ad nauseam.

In 2016, I’m not “resolving” to do anything- resolutions rarely ever work and just create guilt when they don’t, if you care enough about it- but I am hoping to find the courage to make the necessary changes that will improve the outcome of 2016. I don’t know if I’ll be successful. Courage requires overcoming fear, and fear is a bitch of an obstacle when you lack confidence from repeated failures and mistakes. But that’s life too … we fail sometimes. Sometimes we fail multiple times at the same things before we either give up or get better. I’m hoping to get better.

There are many things I hope to do in 2016. I know I won’t accomplish them all, but I’m going to go after as many things as I can, hopefully becoming a better person along the way, doing more good than bad, and doing the types of things that will improve the lives of my family. I know that the year will be bring change, whether I want the changes or not. I can let the changes run me over, or I can become a part of the change and grow. Man, I hope I grow.

Life is hard. And, unlike other things that seem to get easier with experience and practice, life doesn’t seem to be getting any easier as I get older. But there are people in my life who I love. They deserve happiness, and I want to be a part of that happiness.

So, even though I’m not a believer that the New Year brings a fresh start and a clean slate, I am ready to move on from 2015 and attempt to embrace the changes that make me uncomfortable as I look at them now. Fear is a powerful beast. I hope to find the strength to fight those fears and grow stronger in 2016.

I hope you find the strength to overcome your own fears as well. 2016 is tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day. Enjoy each day because each is a gift.

Tim

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